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Carolina charm style columnist Emily Haley sets the table for a holiday family gathering using handmade centerpieces, fine china and crystal stemware, all with the intention of making guests feel comfortable, pampered and able to enjoy food and conversation during dinner. Said Emily, 'It's about bringing people together, around the table.'

Emily HalEy likEs How HEr tablE is tHE scEnE for storiEs to bE rEmEmbErEd – wHEtHEr it's tElling old storiEs or crEating mEmoriEs for nEw storiEs to bE told in yEars to comE. "Some families hand down china and crystal to the next generation. When I sit down at my table and see my grandmother's silver, I remember dinners with her at her house," Haley said. Setting a formal table isn't a necessity said Haley, but it is pretty, she said. "It adds something to the gettogether, making it feel special. It's a way to show your guests they're important," she said. Even as busy as Haley is (as a mom to two boys and one on the way), she plans on setting a formal table for the upcoming holidays. "But the people at the table are what's most important," said Haley. She said she remembers her grandmother telling her that growing up. "Use the best of what you've got. Put a tablecloth on the table, use the plates in your kitchen cabinets, put some tea light candles out. You don't need fine china to make it memorable. And that's what it's about – making memories

Left, is an informal table setting with fewer utensils and 'everyday-use' china. Haley used linens and cloth napkins with a fall pattern, everyday stemware and used a large vase to hold a collection of natural elements she collected from her yard. Tea lights grace the table length for ambient lighting. The right photo is a more formal table setting. Haley used a combination of her fine china and fine china from her mother's collection and her grandmother's silver. Haley said she loves looking at the table and seeing pieces she remembers seeing as a child, at her grandmother's table

Whether you're setting the table or sitting down to eat at a formal dinner, Emily advises not to let the place settings drive you crazy."The most important thing is that everyone is having fun – don't let which fork to use or where to put it intimidate you," she says. If you're interested in a formal place setting, Emily offers this easy guide to help put things in perspective.

1 – Dinner plate 8 – Dessert spoon
2 – Salad plate 9 – Water glass
3 – Dinner fork 10 – Wine glass
4 – Salad fork 11 – Wine glass
5 – Bread plate 12 – Coffee cup
6 – Bread knife 13 – Tea spoon
7 – Dessert fork 14 – Knife
The large plate under the dinner plate is called a charger and is purely decorative.